No one likes to be critiqued – whether the critique follows the writing of a paper for a class and comes in the form of a grade or comes as feedback after you’ve written and published a story, a poem, or a book. Critiques can be harsh. This is especially true when either family members or close friends critique you.
It is a commonality in our culture, and for some odd reason, that not too many people want to say, “Job well done” when it comes to creative writing projects; however, if it is said, you, as the writer, are often left thinking, Did they really read it and what particularly did they like about what I wrote? In other words, the feedback lacks substance. Oftentimes the reader will simply say, “It’s good” and leave it at that. There is also a strange phenomenon that seems to take place when a person seeks a complement or acceptance from someone he or she knows: it seems that by giving positive feedback on a written report, book, or story, the person giving the positive assessment seems to feel that the writer will have one step up on the friend who didn’t produce anything.
As an instructor, I spent so many years giving positive feedback on written material that it has become second nature to me. I will be the first to say, if you worked hard at whatever you composed and you honestly feel you did a good job then you deserve to be told, “Job well done.” I also like to spend moments after reading something to reflect on the piece and on analyzing what I truly enjoyed about the writing.
I am not saying that one should lie or give false hope to a writer. I am saying, though, that if a friend or family member feels unqualified to give constructive criticism then that person should tell the writer that at the onset.
After all, as writers, we are looking for readers who will appreciate and give us constructive criticism on what we have written.
wonders in writing 